Sword of the Spirit

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed
us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ.
For he chose us in him before the creation of the world
to be holy and blameless in his sight.
Ephesians 1:3-4

Apart from me you can do nothing.
John 15:5b

Search me, O God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.
Psalm 139:23-24

For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord.
Live as children of light (for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness,
righteousness and truth) and find out what pleases the Lord.
Ephesians 5:8-10

Therefore, prepare your minds for action; be self-controlled; set your
hope fully on the grace to be given you when Jesus Christ is revealed.
As obedient children, do not conform to the evil desires you
had when you lived in ignorance. But just as he who called you is holy,
so be holy in all you do; for it is written: “Be holy, because I am holy.”
1 Peter 1:13-16

Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good.
Be devoted to one another in brotherly love.
Honor one another above yourselves.
Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord.
Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.
Share with God’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.
Romans 12:9-13

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only
what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it
may benefit those who listen. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God,
with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption.
Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along
with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another,
forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
Ephesians 4:29-32

Are you so foolish? After beginning with the Spirit,
are you now trying to attain your goal by human effort?
Galatians 3:3

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right,
whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—
if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.
Philippians 4:8

For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.
Matthew 6:21

…And he who was seated on the throne said,
“Behold, I am making all things new.”
Revelation 21:5

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.
1 Corinthians 13:13

Life Update in Pink Monkey Notes Format

SETTING
Much of the story takes place in California in the early 2010’s. As in the first couple months of 2010. The main character has migrated (via Altima) from just north of Philadelphia to downtown Los Angeles. Other on-the-spot locations include La Mirada, Santa Monica, Malibu, Las Vegas, St. Louis, Amarillo, Arizona, Glenside PA, Hooksett NH, and Boston.

CHARACTER LIST
Elle
Protagonist. Female in her mid-twenties.
Friends and Family and Strangers
Protagonists and antagonists. You decide.

CONFLICT
Drove across the country with tentative job and ministry positions, none of which panned out. Moved in with an old couple found on Korean craigslist, but less than desirable situation. New car accumulated multiple scratches/scrapes/dents due to street parking &c. Applied for the gamut of jobs, but no takers due to either no experience or “over-qualified”. Also, possible non-graduation if protagonist continues in non-studying for bible class, added last minute due to non-passing of bible exam. Also, there is a gorgeous all-black German Shepherd named Sammy with a killer smile in SD and part of me will die if he’s adopted by someone else.

DEVELOPMENTS
Graphic Design class at Art Center proved to be as good as expected. Opted not to pursue ministry and started attending City Light Church downtown. Starting next week will be on-call as substitute teacher for Christian high school in Santa Monica. Procuring Apple desktop this week, in duty-free New Hampshire. Found a roommate at the Savoy in Little Tokyo, and will be moving in a week and a half. Likely will be taking multiple classes this summer.

THEMES
Rejection. Rain. Spanish. Sushi. Dominoes. Basketball. High-pitched voices.

MOOD
Swings moderately. Darker moments when escape to foreign countries seems unexpectedly alluring, but overall upbeat and optimistic. Optimism may be unsubstantiated in terms of physical evidence or human logic. But happy and so far no stress-induced white hair.

QUOTATIONS
“Everything’s a risk. Staying or moving, taking the chance or leaving it.”
“Elle emo, will you play with me?”
“Warren, your arm is bleeding.”
“I want four kids.”

IMPORTANT/KEY FACTS SUMMARY
To be continued.

ESSAY TOPICS
Too Bad My Beliefs Prohibit Me From Selling My Eggs. So Wrong! Yet So Lucrative!
How Macaroon Ice Cream Sandwiches Take Weight Gain To New Levels
Why Knee-High Winter Boots Are Not Practical in 60 Degree Weather
Rags To Riches: Making $247 At The Craps Table With Ten Bucks
Dehydration Is Real And Makes Your Lips Turn Pale
My Little Sister’s Teaching Practices Scare Me
LA: Traffic Exists Because Good Drivers Don’t
The Benefits to Doggy Bagging Leftover Rice
101 Places To Hide A Stuffed Animal

So You Think You Can Date?

The Lies

One time, as we were leaving the market, he said I can’t eat food in his car. I got in the car and immediately proceeded to eat my food. Nothing happened.

Multiple times in early Feb he said Valentine’s Day was canceled. It wasn’t.

The Threats
I’ve always driven fast and furious. Two weeks ago, I started to scare myself because of how reckless I’d become. I hit a man who I now like to imagine to be my friend, Juan O., a middle-aged Mexican. Also almost hit a bicyclist, but there was no impact, so we missed the opportunity to become friends. Anyhow, he said something like “just be careful.” The expression on his face implied an unspoken “or else.”

The Physical Abuse
So there’s this youtube, and I like to pretend I’m Charlie’s brother. So I’ve taken to responding to even hints of physical contact with a surprised/pained expression and a loud “Owwww-ch!” I’m pretty sure it’s endearing. Why else would I do it. Fine so I pretend there’s physical abuse. But then again if I sit too close to him on a couch or sofa, he will elbow me in the arm or side.

The Verbal Abuse
Upon observing my clever antics or delightful eccentricities, he sometimes says “you are an odd/interesting creature…” Possibly accompanied with a smile, contingent upon degree of delightfulness. Creature is just shy of an expletive.

Once he said I don’t count. Seconds later he added “…to a million.” Nice save.

The Mental Abuse
Perhaps not so much mental abuse as mental anguish. Though the two go hand in hand. Awhile back we were hanging out. I leave the room for a few minutes, when I come back, he’s gone. A crude likeness remains where he had been sitting, in the form of pillows covered by a blanket, only adding to the confusion. Had he been killed? Did someone kidnap him? Two part question, are aliens real, and if so, was it more likely that he’d been taken by one or that he was one? Crazy thoughts raced through my mind as I prepared for the worst. But no. He was hiding. And silently laughing. How could you, boyfriend.

There is this inanimate object. Let’s call him Romses. So there was this incident in which I was craving certain foods, but boyfriend was tired. After much encouraging (carefully aimed jabs), we went out to procure certain foods. We returned a half hour later, and as I’m happily noshing away, I hear boyfriend saying “I did it for you.” I whip around, the words “Thank you!” just having escaped from my lips, only to see that he was talking to Romses. FML.

The PDAs
Yes I’m going there. We used to hold hands in the car or walking outside. Not anymore. We used to hug more in greeting /departing. Not so much. Now when we’re out he’ll put his hand on top of my head for a few seconds. I interpret it as: “You are similar to a large yet well-behaved pet dog.” I like it.

The Edumacation
Contemplated switching into a more serious gear, but let’s not. Have a busy day ahead of me. Must dig a hole outside to bury Romses, arrange a picnic in his backseat, and cancel Christmas. This is what I have learned. Thanks!!!

The Elle Jin Diet

Vitamins
Two sour gummy bears every day. Usu within the first ten minutes of being up.

Bagel
Half a bagel per meal. Usu for breakfast or lunch. Instructions: Butter on frying pan, place bagel face down, squash flat with hand. Once lightly browned flip over and heat for another thirty seconds. Apply cream cheese as desired. This is the maximum effort I prefer to exert on a meal for myself.

Chicken Nuggets
Three nuggets at a time. Breakfast or midday snack(s). Instructions: Arrange in triangular formation on folded paper towel, inserted into microwave. Zap for fifty seconds. Remove and blot with additional paper towels. Optional: pasta sauce plus shredded cheese plus small bun = instant chicken parm slider.

Brie
Favorite cheese. Fresh mozzarella is a close second. On bread, crackers, or standalone. Had some in spinach salad this week, not bad. Thank you France.

Frozen Yogurt
Average once a week. Sometimes with fruit, sometimes with candy. Rarely with both. Always with mochi and jimmies. Pink mochi from Cherry on Top is clutch.

Have been going out for meals far more frequently since I moved out here. But left to my own means, eating revolves around the five options above. Might start bringing granola bars back, for whole grain and fiber. Trying to wean myself off of snacks/sweets. Trying to drink more. DEHYDRATION IS REAL.

A lot of times 1 Corinthians 10:31 comes to mind. “So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.” And it’s helpful right, all Scripture being breathed out by God and useful. But by itself (which it shouldn’t be anyhow~) I’m like what does that mean. Rewind six chapters, verses nineteen and twenty. “Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.” I so easily forget I’m not my own. I so easily get caught up in my failures. But even the good I do is by the grace of God, so what is it really that I’m hoping in. A criticism of the denomination has been that it minimizes the love of God, the loving and being loved by him. And it makes me uneasy because you can’t entirely deny it. You see enough instances where faith becomes dogma to die for, yet it’s stripped of its power to infuse and electrify all of life, and the lives it touches. There is little love.

I love the God I met during seminary. God of covenant, God of my salvation, God who condescended. “The distance between God and the creature is so great…” I love the God I met during missions. God over brokenness, God who hears and answers pleas, God who empowers. “Oh Lord, that’s the cry of my heart…” And yet Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.

Food and drink. What is my food and drink. My food and drink need to change.

Dedication

Heeyoung: you need to write again.
i loved your writing.
your voice in your writing.
you’re more honest and stuff, haha
you should write again.
start up a blog
not the facebook thingy.
please please write.
please blog
out of everyone, i would have you blog.
email me your site. muahahah.